Sunday, 6 January 2013

Guess who's back!!!

Oh WOW, I didn't realize that my last entry was that long ago, 4 1/2 months, JEEPERS!!!

I decided to start blogging again, I am hoping this may help keep me on track & encourage me to let go of feelings that keep creeping up on me.  Sharing or off loading, either way I need to stop carrying around these extra feelings of worrying & being concern of what others think!!!

So 2012 I didn't complete all my goals that I had planned, mainly being losing all the weight that I had wanted to lose.  I can say however I did manage to lose 23kgs in total from my heaviest weight, my heaviest being Jan 2011 - 99.7kgs, so the lowest I got was 76.4kgs last year.  If you don't mind me saying I am pretty BLOODY happy with that effort, that's a lot of emotional baggage I worked through but my journey isn't over, far from it.

So today Monday 7th of Jan 2013 - my weight starts at 78.4kgs, so a gain of 2kgs from my lowest weight, so not too bad.  My goal to reach 65kgs by my 37th birthday on 26th July, my goal weight has never been to get as small as I can but to reach a healthy weight that I can maintain for the rest of my life, it's a realistic weight goal :)  Have seen to many people get hang up on this number on the scale thing & myself included, I do admit I weigh myself pretty much every morning & I know I can hear you all you say DON'T do that, why do you do that for etc...  For me it actually helps to keep me in check, make sure I am not wondering off the track too much, if I see I am going up too much I will pull my head in & start being better with eating or exercising whatever needs to be concentrated on.

In a group that I am with on Facebook, called Just Do It, which was created by my cousin for people that are like minded & needing to be inspired or encouraged with their weight loss or exercise goals, I found my a challenge for 2013.  Last year I wanted to do a 1/2 marathon, but never really trained or pushed myself to do it.  I did however complete other goals that I wanted to do :)  So Tina Flack a member in this group has suggested for us to do the Taupo 1/2 Marathon this year, so that is my big exercise challenge.  I will register as a runner purely so if I want to walk/run I can, however I am going to try my hardest to complete it by doing a jog.  To honest I don't care how I complete it as long as I complete it, that's really my goal!!!

So last year 2012 was all about me tackling my weight loss goals & being a better me, by spending more time on myself instead of always focusing on others.  So this year 2013, I will continue with that work, but I also want to be a better Wife & Mum.  To be fair having done last year & doing a year where I was more focused on myself has actually enabled me to be a better Wife & Mum because I am happier within myself then I was when I was overweight.  However I want to spend more time with my family & loved ones, the kids are growing up too fast & I want to savior more moments together, create more memories together as a family.

Hubby & I have never been stronger & more happier then we are today, which I LOVE!!!  We have some big goals for 2013, one of then being finding our first home together.  We got pre-approved last year 2 months ago & are trying to keep it on the down low, but I have trouble sharing happy news, in the words of my hubby I have a big mouth ha ha ha :)  So if you are learning about this for the time it's not been that I haven't wanted to tell you, hubby said not to put it on Facebook.  So this particular blog will only be shared in private groups.  It's fun house hunting, but when you have a budget you have to stick too, it's hard, especially when the area you want to live in isn't the cheapest compared to other areas.   All good I know we will find the perfect house for us :)

The other goal I need to work on, is forgetting about what people think of me.  I have a pretty positive, bubbly personality & I always like to see the good in people.  Unfortunately that has hurt me in the pass, so it has made me more cautious about people.  In this world we will always have people who will sit on their perches judging others & looking down on us.  Those people are not people I want in my life anyway & to be fair a lot of the time those people have far to many issues of their own that they need to make themselves feel better by being like that.  Otherwise they would need to look in the mirror & see who they really are & face some truths, so majority of them don't & focus on putting down others.  I have had a life-time of being bullied, especially by girls & on the most part it's jealously which creates this.  My life has not been a bed or roses, so I am proud of who I am & where I am in life, yes their are things I am not proud of in my past, but those experiences has help mold me into the person I am today.  I am over people being FAKE & INSINCERE, if you actually want to be part of my life be involved with genuine intentions.  If not don't pretend to care, be true to yourself.

I will continue to be grateful for my wonderful life & all the amazing things I get to have in life, because my life really has been enriched since learning to be grateful for what I have.  I will continue to take one step at a time in my personal journey of bettering myself as a person, wife & mum & I will learn to let go of things that aren't worth me worrying about.

Time is precious & we must spend our time with who we love & what we love doing!!!